Thursday, May 19, 2016

A Mother Cries

As he’s pulled from his mother’s womb
and cat-like cries pierce through expectation,
doctors clean
his wrinkled, red form.
Daddy brings him close for a kiss.
A mother cries.
-----

A tiny body
quivers
With fever and pain.
A mother tries
     to comfort,
          to soothe.
Helpless,
a mother cries.
-----

In anguish
he sprawls on the cold tile,
unyielding sobs,
     little red face,
          contorted and wet.
“Don’t. Leave. Me. Mommy!”
Reassuringly,
She hugs him one more time.
On the way to work,
a mother cries.
-----

Home from school,
a bedroom door slams
     shutting out his pain.
His face flushes in anger.

Isolated.
They can’t bully him here.
Music is his only anesthetic.
He doesn’t hear her questions
from the other side of the door.
A mother cries.
-----

Laid off again.
The economy is down, they say.
The bills keep coming.
What will happen if he can’t pay?
The car - repossessed,
a foreclosure on their home.
They still have each other.
Life is much worse for some.
Far away,
a mother cries.
-----

Starting over at forty-nine,
twenty-two years of love behind.
Unbearable.
Inconceivable.
The color of their love
fades from red to black.
How will he go on?
Without her.
His teenage son's shattered heart
is motivation enough.
Somehow he will be strong.

Still her little boy,
a mother cries.
-----

Lines accent his eyes and forehead,
telling more than just his age.
Happiness found him again,
though, some would argue, too late.

His mother lies
on a narrow, rigid bed,
cold white sheets,
pale walls,
a mixture of disinfectant and urine
perfumes the shared halls.

His mother tries
not to let him see her pain.
She’s not afraid to die,
Just terrified to leave him too soon.
A mother cries.

She’s as fragile as a baby bird.
No trace of the rosy blush of youth.
They must say their goodbyes.
He holds her hand
as she says her last prayer
     for him.
One last time,
a mother cries.

©  9/14/2012

Fall Remembered

Dry, fallen leaves crunch beneath my feet
Burnt orange, crimson red, chestnut brown, and lemon yellow
hang from soon to be barren trees
White-gray clouds billow from chimneys
Gaseous, white puffs of breath escape with each exhale
Stillness.
The season silences the chirping birds and
Sends rabbits scurrying to their refuge under naked shrubbery
The cold, rough leather sphere stings as I catch my cousin’s pass
Barbecue beckons us indoors to Auntie’s kitchen
Sweet, smoky, savory chicken, ribs, and sausages
Steaming hot chocolate with melting mini-marshmallows
Warms chilled and numb hands.
Nutmeg, cinnamon, ginger and hazelnut season the traditional mud pie
Oak and maple logs burn in the weathered fireplace
Orange, red, brown, and yellow
On soon to be barren trees
Dry, fallen leaves crunch beneath my feet.

25 September 2011

Stephanie L. P. De los Santos

Friday, May 6, 2016

The Pearl in the Sand

Your eyes play hide-and-seek with mine
as you slip back into class
hoping no one notices,
praying you will be left alone.

You know I know.
I know you know.

Your heavy eyes hold mine
for an eternal moment.
until your gaze is sucked to the floor
by the force of your failure,
a gravitational pull
constraining your eyes,
        restricting your vision,
                confining your view
to below.

Below the laughter and the smiles,
beneath shared jokes and common experiences,

You hide
believing
you are truly beneath them.
Stripped of your self-worth,
You continue to meet their expectations.
You fail again
        and again
                  and again
until someone notices
the pearl in the sand.

SLPD   5/6/2016

Friday, April 8, 2016

Free

by Stephanie De los Santos
The highway overpass shelters me
From the vindictive wind and rain,
And I wonder why I feel safer here
Than all the places I’ve been.

No one will hurt me tonight.
No one will make me go
To yet another loveless house
More cruel than the one before.

I hope that you are safe tonight,
That your heart knows peace and love.
I hope that you have been protected
As they promised me you would.

One day soon we’ll meet again -
A reunion so well deserved.
We’ll be free from the irreconcilable past

Free from all the hurt.

Thursday, March 24, 2016

Hope for my Child

by Stephanie De los Santos

A child -
lost innocence,
Dreams crushed
Hopes scattered






like seeds in a seemingly barren field.
Some will die,
remain buried deep.
Others will hide
below the surface
waiting for the warmth
of the sun,
the refreshment of the rains.
They will be reborn,
even blossom
in time.
Purpose will prevail,
though it alludes her now.
Yet, I dream of her.


The child I hope for
hopes not for me,
agonizes at the thought
of my home,
would rather be
alone.
Yet, I hope for her.

This child
resents the intrusion
into her life,
angers
at the disruption
of her world,
yearns for love,
but not from me.
Yet, I love her still.

My child
feels abandoned,
isolated,
out of place.
She hears others laugh,
wonders where
she left her joy,
her smile.
Yet, I welcome her,
yearn for her,
feel blessed
to call her mine.
     
My daughter,
   not yet mine,
will be forced
from her home
by a stranger.
She is struggling now
to concentrate in class
because she is hungry,
insecure,
angry.



None of this
is her fault,
though she feels
she is to blame.
She is angry,
but she can’t
tell you why.
She is bruised,
but she won’t,
tell you how.
She cries,
but no one sees 
her tears.

Copyright © 2015 by Stephanie De los Santos

Friday, January 8, 2016

Soft Rains

Leaves turn,
Warning us with veined bellies
Of a coming storm.
Gentle winds
Tousle our hair
Leaving the impression
Of disarray,
Disappointment,
Devastation.
.                                                        
Image result for leaves before the rain turned
Unprepared,
We hide away
In cars,
Homes,
bedrooms.
We take shelter
Within ourselves-
Within our own mind
Among our own kind.


Fearfully,
We brace ourselves,
Secure doors and windows,
Hearts and minds.
We startle at each unfamiliar
Sound,
Image result for peace
Sight,
Or suggestion.

And the leaves turn.
Gentle breezes subside.
Soft rains cease.
The earth is cleansed.
There was never any reason to fear.


Stephanie De los Santos
1/7/16